Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
vagina is talking i cant
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
