just come out here and I will go home with you...
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
