No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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