If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
