i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
