There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize