Jerry, you need to find god
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
