I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
She's the barista slut.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
We are all done wearing pants today
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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