1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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