I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
