Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Randomize
