You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
