nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
