I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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