Whod you bang
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize
