I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Randomize
