Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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