if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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