didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
