Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
