And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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