So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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