Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
