Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
