so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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