Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
