I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
