i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
