I just saw a hot homeless man
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
