Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
