I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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