you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
