Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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