So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Your penis caused this!
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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