how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
