Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
