what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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