Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize