So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
