Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
