Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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