I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
