3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize
