You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
