What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize