And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
