My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
