We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I have tasted many bathrooms
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
