My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
