I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
