your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize